The Holiday Curse and Santa's Surprise

Hi readers. I am writing to you from my couch in my jammies with a heating pad and big blanky....because I am sicker than sick. My entire body hurts, I am dizzy and nauseous, I am hot then I am cold, my nose is stuffy then runny, and it feels like someone dragged a knife down the back of my throat.
I have strep throat and a kidney infection. The kidney infection I have had for over a week but the strep I just got....on Christmas Eve. Honestly, I was not surprised; I was actually expecting it. Why would I be expecting to be sick on Christmas? Because I have a curse. Since I was born 27 years ago, I have been sick for every single majorly celebrated holiday. And I do not mean with the sniffles or the common cold, although I would love for that to be the case. No, I mean I have been actually sick with something that required a prescription for every Easter, 4th of July, Halloween, Birthday, Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years. So why should this year be any different? Of course I have Strep Throat on Christmas.
And you know how it could only get worse readers? I have passed on this curse to my children. Thankfully, their's is not nearly as severe as mine is: birthdays, Easter and Halloween tend to be the worst for them. So I am sure you can imagine I am really hoping that they do not get this and stay healthy through New Years.

So now that I have explained the curse and whined about feeling icky, let's move on to the giant Christmas surprise that my tiny humans and I got this year. First, a little background:
My little sister is a Second Lieutenant in the Air Force and in July she was moved from being here with us, to California, three time zones away. She is my best friend and my tiny ones adored her. We were ready for our first Christmas apart. It was not something we wanted to do, but something we understood was going to become our version of normal--being apart on Christmas.
On Saturday December 21st, the love of my life, his three kids, The Nursing Nurse and her husband and I were all going out to dinner. (My tiny ones were at their BF's house.) When we got to where we were eating, my love and I took the kids and The Nursing Nurse's infant to the table and she said she was staying up front and calling her husband to see how long he was going to be. As we were getting situated at the table and I was getting the baby out of her car seat, my love kept telling me to sit down. So I finally sat down and I look up and The Nursing Nurse is walking to the table, holding her cell phone with a giant smile on her face.....with my baby sister behind her in uniform.
Very loudly I said, "What are you doing here? How did you get here?!" I froze. My mouth dropped, I smiled, and as all of the restaurant was watching me, I started sobbing. The last time I got to hug my sister was when she was leaving to go to California five months ago; I stood there and hugged her for what felt like an eternity. When we finally sat down, I do not think I let go of her the entire time we were there, even when we were eating. After dinner, she came to my house and we caught up before she had to go back to her moms house (we are half sisters, we have different moms) but before she left we came up with a plan to surprise the kids.
Both of my tiny humans wrote letters to Santa this year asking to bring their Aunt home for Christmas. Then, to make it even more heart wrenching, they asked him to bring her home again when we went to see him at our local Santa's Wonderland. It was hard for me, especially since I had no idea she would actually be here when all of this happened. So imagine how excited I was to be able to surprise them with her on Christmas morning! So we planned it out perfectly. I got the kids back from their BF at 9pm on Christmas Eve and they went to bed as soon as we got home. Once they were asleep, she came over and we wrapped a GIANT box--it was seriously big enough she could have slept in it. We cut the top off and wrapped the sides and then made sure we had enough to tape down on top after she climbed in. Then we hid in my bedroom all night and went to sleep. In the morning, I made sure we woke up first with enough time to get ready. My sister climbed in the box, we taped the wrapping paper down and then I woke up the tiny humans. They were really excited to see everything that Santa brought, and of course they wanted to open the big box first. When they opened it and their Aunt popped out, they were shocked! They asked her how she got there and of course she told them Santa brought her in his sleigh. They were so excited; it really was our best Christmas to date. But with that fantastic surprise, comes the tearful goodbyes. The day after Christmas, we went to breakfast with her, her mom and step-dad, and our Brother. We shared our last three hours together laughing and eating and talking. And we made the goodbyes quick; although not tear-less, this "See-ya" was much easier than the first time.
That readers, was the highlight of our Christmas. Not the gifts, not the food....our Family was together for the holiday and it was more than I could have ever asked for. I have always cried watching video's of servicemen and women coming home to their loved ones to surprise them but I never thought that YouTube video would be me....and now it is. I love her so much and I am so proud of her. I hope all of you out there had a beautiful Christmas and I hope your New Year is full of blessings!

Happy Holidays!

With the exception of our little Elf, Nook, hiding new places every night and waiting for the tiny humans to find him, last night felt like the kick off to Christmas in our house: we went to see the big guy. We go to a store in our town that has a big Santa's Workshop set up every year; games, concessions, Santa and tons of decorations--this year there was even a carousel! We took pictures at all the little "photo-op" sets, and of course got to see the Man himself!
My kids cracked me up though. I asked them if they wanted to go together or separately and they told me they wanted to go together....while holding hands....which made me smile. Anyway! So I took them up there and tiny boy human was suddenly very shy! This was hilarious to me because last year he was all about sitting on Santa's lap and could not stop telling him the mile long list of what he wanted for Christmas, but this year, he could barely muster enough a one syllable word and looked to me for answers with every question the Jolly One asked:

Santa: Have you been a good boy this year?
TBH: (looking at me and nearly whispering) Mom....?
Me: Well have you been good?
TBH: (to Santa, again almost whispering) Yes.
Santa: What do you want for Christmas?
TBH: ....mom....um....I don't remember.
Me: Well in your letter you asked for Aunt Allison, playdoh, legos and an Ipad, right?
TBH: Yeah....
Me: Well tell Santa. He repeats what I said to Santa
Santa: Legos huh? Do you like to build things?
TBH: Mom....
Me: Do you like to build things goober? At this point I'm laughing out loud.
TBH: Yes.
Santa: Ok well if you have been a good boy maybe I'll have to bring you some! Merry Christmas!
TBH: (To santa) Ok. Merry Christmas. (To me) Mom....can I get down?
Me: (laughing) Yes honey. Come on.

Now, I have to admit, that was pretty funny and I couldn't help but laugh. And for those of you who do not know, their Aunt Allison is in the Air Force and is California; she is their best friend and they want her home for Christmas, but she is not allowed to come home until after January. But the girl was just as funny! After we had our picture taken--and yes, I was required to be in it per orders from my tiny ones....even though I really didn't want to be--she had had enough and was ready to go! She completely forgot about telling him what she wanted! The flash went off and she tried to get down! So I reminded her to tell him what she wanted, and through her speech delay, mumbling and very low voice, Santa heard:

"Allison, Doc McStuffins, movies, new leappad games and Dora."

That was it haha! So he said Merry Christmas to her and she said it back and then my kids grabbed my hands like they were in a hurricane and my hands were the only things that would save them from being blown away. We got our picture, played some games and then were on our way. I wish we could have stayed much longer but we were on a schedule to get home so they could go to their BF's house.
Which brings me to missing my tiny ones. They are spending the next five days at their BF's house--I get them back Christmas Eve at 9pm--and I miss them like crazy. But I know when I pick them up they will be so excited to see me and that Christmas morning they will wake up with the biggest smiles....and that will all be with me. I can't wait <3
We wish you all happiness, joy and a very Merry Christmas!

Sweet Candy: One of Those Days

Today was an extremely weird day for me. It started off great! I got my tree when it started snowing and spent some quality time with my sister. But then I saw my ex....again. 2 days in a row now, and definitely not on purpose. He occasionally passes me in his work vehicle, while I'm in my work vehicle and he happened to see me dancing in my van with my clients!!! lol without my knowledge. It's tough for me, because I've been trying to get over him. But everything happens for a reason, so I'm trying to go with the flow.
Then, later today as I was walking up the sidewalk to my other job, an old crabby lady was driving up the street, stopped in the middle, and started yelling at me, saying my car was too close to her handicapped parking spot. She then stated she was calling the cops and having my car towed! (Which of course made my blood pressure rise). I went inside, put my things down and walked back outside, moved my car a couple inches, lol, and started walking back in. She continued to yell at me with her threats and all I said back was, "you must not have taken your medication today or your extremely sleep deprived cuz your mood is screwy!"
The cops arrived and said I didn't do anything wrong; there was no need for me to even move it. She continued to yell at me in front of the officer. According to the other worker, she frequently makes calls on other people all the time. When I heard that, I felt a sense of sadness. This crabby old lady must be a very angry, hurt person. If she feels like there's nothing else to do nice in her life. How can you be so grumpy when it's snowing out? Why couldnt she ask me to move up a little? (even though i was 4 1'2 feet away from where her car would be parked).. It just saddens me when people are like this.. Word of encouragment to you readers out there: Be pleasant and nice to strangers. Dont yell at people for stupid stuff. =)

Are YOU a Mom?

You know, I never imagined my life would change so drastically when I had my children. There are times where even I amaze myself at my intense mommy-skills. But how do you know when you are really a MOM? I have come up with a list here that may make you giggle at first, and then realize that you too are a Super Amazing Mother.

1) Instead of running from projectile vomit, I run towards it. It is easier to wash my hands than to steam-vac the carpet!
2) A night out with adult beverages requires more recovery time than major surgery, including two sick days!
3) I do more in seven minutes than most people do in seven hours.
4) Vacations have gone from sunny beaches and booze by the pool, to grocery shopping alone.
5) Instead of dollar drafts of skunky beer, Happy Hour is now the 60 minutes between when the kids go to bed and when my head hits the pillow.
6) My nutritional pyramid has changed its definitions of "nutritional." Wine is made from grapes, grapes are fruit, therefore: Wine now counts as a daily serving of fruit! And we all know that a well balanced diet requires 3-4 servings of fruit, right? Wait, is that just the wine talking?
7)) Who needs to pay for therapy? I will have mini-therapy sessions all day long, even with strangers! I will tell anyone with an ear and the will to listen about my issues, even if they are deeply personal and in "mommy talk." Example: bumping into an elderly, distant relative who politely asks how the children are, without any real interest and I respond: "My daughter STILL refuses to wipe her own butt when she makes a stinky in the potty so I always have to do it AND check her underwear for any remains from the day so I know when to treat for stains or throw them out and buy new big girl panties!"
8) I can experience Heaven (hugs, kisses, snuggles, and "I love you's") and Hell (stepping on legos, wiping boogers, "you're mean!") multiple times a day.
9) It is two in the morning. My significant other is snoring, loudly. My bedroom door is closed. The kids' bedroom is three rooms away and their door is closed. The heat just kicked on so there is a humming noise. And I STILL hear a sneeze followed by a cough and then a whimper. A cold has reached a small one! I am able to get out of bed, without waking my darling, sleeping SO and able to walk down the hall, get the kid out of bed and find the cold medicine....all without turning on a single light.
10) Sex life? What is that? Where are my flannel jammies at?? Point me towards my bed please....with my pillow and my giant down comforter! (Ok to be honest, this one does not really apply to me. I don't even own any flannel pajamas and my sex life is, well--at risk of TMI--outstanding! But I know there are many of you out there who feel like this, thus why it is on the list!)
11) I have heard some women speak of something called a "Spa" where they go to get pampered and relax. Here I thought that was what my 15 minute shower ALONE was for!
12) Sometimes I would like to pee by myself....oh that is out of the question now? Well damn it then. I guess I should just get used to the audience.
13) I use baby wipes for EV.ER.Y.THING. Kid sneezed? Baby wipe. Spilled coffee on the floor? Baby wipe. Dash of my car is dusty? Baby wipe. Seriously, NOTHING will ever come in as handy as baby wipes.
14) I HATE being sick, with a passion, but I would much rather have a 103 degree fever instead of my tiny humans. Probably because the instant they get sick, or at least start showing symptoms, it is too late and they already have pneumonia and have to be admitted to the children's hospital. (Ahh, the life of preemies!)
15) You know when you go to the hospital and they ask you about your pain level on a scale from 1-10? I no longer have that scale. My pain can be registered on a four tiered system: pain, excruciating pain, Kidney stones or stepping on a Lego.
16) Sometimes, I wish I could have the stomach flu. Just so I could have diarrhea and lock myself in the bathroom and have some time to myself. Actually, I might pretend to have diarrhea tonight, just to catch up on some reading!
17) Every mom has seen that ecard about hiding in a closet and carefully unwrapping a candy bar as to not make any noise so you do not have to share, right? Well, it is true. And I may or may not have my own secret stash of chocolate in my house because frankly, I just do not want to share sometimes.
18) How many times do YOU wash a single load of laundry? While many of you are answering, "just once, why?" in a very confused and concerned voice, I am washing the same load of laundry for the fourth time because I keep forgetting to dry it and now it smells....again.
19) Everyone has their own favorite television programming, right? Well, apparently mine is anything on Disney or Nick.... for at least 30 minutes after my children have been in bed....because I could not find the remote and was too tired from the day to look for it. And to clear, I hate the yellow sponge with buck teeth. He is the worst.
20) I love hearing how other people have accomplished so much during their day and all I can think to myself is, "Well, the kids are up, dressed and fed....I am showered and brushed my teeth....And nobody has died; seems like a successful day to me!"
21) I can talk on my cell phone, carry my 35 pound son, have my purse on one shoulder and carry 2 gallons of milk and 7 bags of groceries up 2 flights of stairs while yelling at my daughter to stop picking her nose....all at the same time. It is called multi-tasking people, and it is a handy little skill to have!
22) I have a car. I love my car. I do not have to pay on it, it is mine, for as long as I want it. Which at this point will be forever. First, because I cannot afford to have another bill to pay every month. And secondly, because no detailing shop in the universe could get out the stains from spilled beverages or ground in poptarts out, no matter how hard they tried.
23)It is amazing how good a can of Chef Boyardee Spaghetti can taste after a long day! Seriously, I wish I could make meatballs that tasted that good!
There you have it readers, 23 reasons that make me realize how much my life has changed since bringing my tiny humans into this world. Can you relate? What would you add to this list? Leave us your comments below!

The Next Step

The love of my life and I celebrated our 1 year anniversary in November and it has been every thing that I could have dreamed of--I would not want to imagine my life without him in my future. In the first 12 months of our relationship, he has become a very big part of my family, a very important part at that, but I often felt like things were incomplete because I had not met his 3 tiny humans. I knew that when he was comfortable with me meeting them I would, and I did not push him to make that decision because I did not want him to feel pressured and I did not want him to resent me for "forcing" him to make a decision that he was not ready for. I wanted him to make that choice on his own, when he was ready for it.

I am writing you today, readers, to let you know that I am beaming from ear to ear and have been since Saturday. Why, you ask? Because not only was this Thanksgiving our first time going to each others family holiday events, but I got to meet his kids.

That is right readers: he took that giant leap forward and let me meet his tiny humans. I could not be happier. What made it better was that my tiny ones and his tiny ones got along GREAT! And his three seemed to be really comfortable with me--I was even allowed to take the oldest one to get a new charger for one of her electronics, just her and I!

Later, he asked them each individually what they thought about me and while the youngest two just said something general along the lines of "I liked her," the oldest told him I was a "9 out of 10!" Needless to say, I am very happy with the outcome of our first meeting and I look forward to slowly getting to know them each more as we move into the future. Everything is exactly how I hoped it to be readers, and that makes this mommy beyond happy.

Pixie Mama: The Beginning

I’ve been blogging for a while under another name as a single mom but when I was contacted about this new blog starting up I decided it was time for a fresh start. So you maybe are wondering where I’m going to start with this. I will start from the day my family became complete. It was almost 2 years ago and now looking back at it all it seems like a fairy tale. I went from homeless, poor, and alone to finding the love of my life (just "Love" from now on), having a home, and having a complete family.
I’d technically been in labor for a day and a half already but I wasn't dilating yet. The pain just kept getting worse and worse. I finally called my mother who had just come to town the day before. I just couldn't take the pain anymore. My mom came over and sat with me while she timed my contractions. It was definitely time for my boy to make his big debut into the world. I don’t think he will ever understand how big his birth was for me, or at least not until he has his own children.
My mom got me in the car and we went to pick up my step-dad. I was in so much pain and they were cracking jokes the whole time; it's a wonder I didn't strangle them both! It seemed like my mom was going over every possible pot hole and railroad track on the route and my step-dad was making all kinds of jokes about my water breaking and my son being born in the rental car; they're lucky I was in so much pain. I was in way too much pain to strangle the both of them. For the record, my water never broke on it's own, the doctors had to do it for me.
We got to the hospital and I was admitted. They put me in a wheel chair despite my telling them it hurt worse when I was sitting. They put me in labor triage and I was there for what felt like hours with a RN telling me that I wasn't in labor. We all knew I was but because it wasn't registering on the monitor she swore I was having Braxtin Hicks. Finally, thanks to my cousin who had delivered at the same hospital, a midwife decided that my contractions weren't registering because I was having back labor. They waited to move me til I was at 3 cm. Once I was moved thing started to get hazy. I was given Nubian first, really didn't work. People came in and out. They put me on an oxygen mask because my O2 levels were low. They gave me the epidural. Then the next thing I remember is the beautiful moment my son was born. He was born the day before I was suppose to be induced. I panicked at first, I couldn't hear him cry. They laid him on my chest while they finished up. He had a lot of hair for a newborn. His body was covered in fine, newborn baby hair; even to this day Mini me has a hairy back. His eyes were dark brown almost black but I could see him staring right at me. He reached straight for my hand. I cried like I never had in my whole life. The most beautiful boy I had ever seen in my life and he was right there and mine. After everyone had come and gone--I'd be willing to bet the hospital had never had that many people waiting for a single baby!--I was left with my son and my thoughts. I couldn't sleep. I don’t like hospitals and sleeping in one was not something I was thrilled about. Never the less I had one of the best accomplishments of my life a little boy who looked like he was made completely of me. My life, my love, my angel, my mini me

Kindergarten Success!

My Tiny Boy Human has ADHD and ODD (oppositional defiant disorder), making him very difficult to deal with when he does not have his medication. I did not want to medicate him at first; I tried all sorts of natural ways to help him with his inability to focus: herbs, diet restrictions, etc…and nothing worked. Once I decided to try the medication, I wanted to kick myself in the rear for not giving it to him sooner! The change in him was immediate, and it was a lifesaver! He was able to listen better and follow directions, so he was no longer getting in trouble. I was no longer yelling at him or pulling my hair out in clumps or crying in a corner because I was losing my mind. We no longer had shouting matches which resulted in tears….things were all together much easier, and our house became much happier!

Tiny Boy Human started Kindergarten and seemed to be having trouble adjusting to school. Thankfully, his teacher has her own children with ADHD and knew immediately that his trouble stemmed from his medication not “kicking in” until nearly lunch time, making morning learning time a struggle for both him and her. So his pediatrician changed his medication to something that would be faster acting. Little did I know, the new medication he was prescribed was only going to help with the attention deficit part of his disorder, only to make his ODD worse. He was going to the office daily and I am pretty sure he broke some sort of record when he, my 5 YEAR OLD, was suspended from school for 2 days on only his third week of KINDERGARTEN. No friends, you are not hallucinating; you read that correctly. He was removed from school for 2 days due to his poor behavior, of which he really had no control over. It was heartbreaking, as his mother, to see him struggling so much when I knew that inside he wanted to be good but his brain just was not functioning the way it was supposed to.

But the good news is, we changed his medication back to the original with the plan of giving it to him much earlier to give it time to absorb into his system so he would be ready for class right away! And it worked! He no longer has any issues at school and he is thriving! He tells me every day how much he loves going to school, riding the bus, and even homework! That’s right readers, he loves his homework!

Tiny Boy Human got his first report card and out of 25 graded areas, he got 21 S's (standard met--highest marks), 3 N's (needs improvement) and only 1 U (standard not met). He also received +'s (highest markings) in all 8 graded areas for work habits and study skills! And then, he read a book to me:

"This is my yellow bear. This is my red bear. This is my purple bear. This is my blue bear. This is my brown bear. I have many bears."

He read it all, all by himself, and only needed help with the word "many." He has been reading a book to me every night; it is a little bittersweet to go from reading to him while in our glider, to him reading to me, but I am so proud!

We had "student lead" parent teacher conferences this week. In terms of his scholastic performance, he's averaging a "B" level. He knows all of his letters and numbers, and writes them all very well. He reads at level 2 (out of 3!), he knows a lot of his sight words, and the only thing he doesn't do well with is rhyming; he thinks rhyming means the words have to start with the same letter instead of end in the same sound, he just doesn't get it yet. If he can figure out rhyming he would be one of the top students in his class! His behavior is awesome when he has his medication, and even when he doesn't have it (for various reasons we really do not want to get into) and has trouble controlling himself and focusing, his teacher says he is "one of the sweetest kids I have ever worked with and we have the closest bond out of all of my students." And that was proven when he was asked what his favorite part of school was and he replied, "being with *Mrs. Teacher!"

STOP TOUCHING THAT

I thought I would share with you some of the embarrassing and comical antics that my children put me through daily. As you may have read in my introduction, I have two children: Tiny Boy Human and Tiny Girl Human. They say and do off the wall things all the time, but being 5 and 3, respectfully, I expect that, especially since I am sarcastic and love to make people laugh. Most recently, the funny things I have had to endure involve my children “discovering” themselves.

TINY GIRL HUMAN: TGH is OBSESSED with her business; many of you may call it something else (va jay jay, downstairs, vag, sunshine….etc) but in our house, she has a business. Why? Because it is nobody else’s damn business, that is why. (Pretty clever, huh? Yeah, I can be pretty witty sometimes ha ha.) Anyway!! She is infatuated with it. She is constantly touching it, pulling it apart, and has even recently started putting things near it—which makes me extremely uncomfortable. She will walk around our house naked and show everyone her "stuff," so I have tried and tried to tell her to stop or that she can explore but to do it in private. So far, I have gotten nowhere and she is still walking around with her hands in her pants. Great.

TINY BOY HUMAN: TBH’s story is a little more comical. A few weeks ago, he came to me and was genuinely concerned when he said, “Mommy, something is wrong with my balls.” My son has a little bit of a speech delay for a 5 year old so it was everything I could do not to laugh at him when it sounded more like "bwalls." So as composed as I could be, I asked him what he meant. With a very worried face he said, “Well, there are cracks all over them. But they are not bleeding or anything!” That just confused me further and made me want to laugh even more, but I bit my lip and asked him to show me in the bathroom. As he dropped his drawers he proceeded to tell me that the wrinkles in the skin around his testicles, his scrotum, was cracked and he was seriously bothered by it. I then had to explain to him that that was completely normal, all while trying not to burst out laughing. And then it got harder because he insisted on asking me a million questions, none of which I knew the answer to because let’s face it, I am a woman….I know minimal things about those parts.

Pretty funny, right? Well that is not the end of the TBH story. This past week, as he was getting dressed, he finds it necessary to announce to me that he has 2 “balls” and that his are “way small.” So as I am trying not to laugh yet again, he is bombarding me with questions: “why do I have 2? Why are they smaller? Are they going to get bigger? When are they going to get bigger? This has my balls in it!” (He was holding his scrotum)…..I almost fell down. It was a good 3 minutes of rapid fire questions, none of which I could answer other than “That is normal honey” while trying not to laugh hysterically.

So there it is. Both of my children are fascinated with their privates and it is taking every ounce of my self restraint not to crack up about it every time they bring it up. It is not because I am immature about it; I am just not prepared for these questions when they just ask me at the most random times. So hug your tiny ones and appreciate the funny and innocent things that spill from their mouths….these times will be over too fast and speaking for myself, I know I am going to miss them! So what are some of the most embarrassing things your children have done?

Raising Gentlemen

There are many obstacles that I am facing raising my son to be a gentleman and not just your everyday "dude." So I have come up with some things that I want him to learn as he grows up so he knows how to properly behave and treat a woman! What would you add? Tell me in your comments!
The kitchen is NOT just for girls. Get in there and learn to use the damn stove.

You do not try to change who a girl is and you do not ever let a girl try to change who you are. If either of you do, you don't really love each other in the first place.

SHOWER. USE DEODORANT. TRIM YOUR NAILS. BRUSH YOUR TEETH AND GARGLE. GROOM YOURSELF ACCORDINGLY so you do not look or smell like a bum!

A dutch over is NEVER funny. Ever.

Breaking up with a girl over the phone is never acceptable. You need to do it face to face and as kindly as you can. If it would break your heart, it will most certainly break hers.

Understand when, where and how to use basic tools.

If you ever ask a girl if something is wrong and she answers, "no," she's lying. She's just testing you to see if you care enough to keep asking. Keep asking.

The job of a stay-at-home mom is just as hard as any out-of-home career, sometimes even more difficult. Remember that.

I taught you table manners. Use them.

You will never know a stronger pull than that of your friends trying to get you to participate in their wrong doing. Resisting makes you a man. Succumbing makes you a coward and a sheep.

NEVER use your fists to solve ANY dispute. One wrong punch could take a life and it could be yours. I taught you to speak eloquently--use what you have learned and use your words.

Condoms will save your life. And your girlfriends. Even better than that, abstinence. Wait, wait, wait.

Do not use the word Gay in a derogatory manner, EVER. I have raised you to be an incredibly accepting human--don't be ignorant.

Sexting is a federal offense--you WILL go to prison. Besides, you do not want to lower your own self-worth or self-respect and any girl that is willing to send you those kinds of messages is probably not the kind of girl you want to be with anyway.

Real girls do not look like Victoria's Secret models. Real girls come in every shape, size and color. Every person is beautiful.

ALWAYS hug and kiss your mother. She gave you life, she has raised you, she was the one that was there every single second of every single day. Always tell her you love her and you are grateful to her, every single day. You are never too old to love and respect your mother.

If someone drops something, help them pick it up. It is called lending a helpful hand. You have two hands, do it at least twice a day....more if the opportunity is presented to you!

Every girl is someone's sister, mom, daughter, friend, etc....Treat her the way you would want your's treated!

Using the phrases "please, thank you, yes/no ma'am and yes/no sir" will make you a more respectful and respected person.

Respect the elderly just as you would your own grandparents.

Be true to yourself. Stand up for what you believe in, but always respect the opinions of others. Every one is entitled to their own beliefs and opinions. Do not ever belittle somebody for being themselves.

Stand up for the underdog. Do not tolerate bullying. Remember: a person who sits back and watches the bullying without stepping in to stop it is just as responsible as the person doing the bullying.

Speak up.

Be a leader AND a follower. Playing both roles will give you a healthy life balance.

Try EVERYTHING at least once. Food, sports, creative arts....you will never know what you truly love if you don't open your mind.

If you aren't interested in a girl, do not say you will call her. Do not use her for a one night stand. Do not lead a girl on. EVER.

Tobacco is NOT cool. Neither are drugs. It will diminish your appearance, make you smell bad, and do ungodly things to your health. Please, do not get caught up in the hype. It is a nasty habit to smoke, chew, or use.

A Guide to Life

Be good to yourself. There are some things everyone deserves: love, respect, time to recharge. Never settle for less.

Seek out your dreams. Start small. Take it as it comes. Even a butterfly has to inch along as a worm before getting its wings.

Listen to your heart. Trust your gut. If the way seems unclear, look within you.

Let your voice be heard. You have a story to tell and opinions that count. And a difference to make.

Stay curious, wonder. Take every opportunity to learn. Knowledge is a gift. It will take you places; do not take it for granted.

Hold on to what is important. Let worries go. No matter how you look at it, some things just do not make sense. The way you choose to carry on is what really matters.

And when you make that list of everything you want in life, be sure to make another list of what you have already got. And be sure to start that list with all the things that make you into what I already know you to be: a beautiful person. Those reasons are enough to write a book, there are so many.

But above all, most importantly, please remember you are wanted, cherished and loved, and will be for eternity.